Passions

So lately I have been thinking a lot about dancing. I miss it. When I think about dancing, I get that same feeling I get when I think about picking up apple blossoms and putting them in my tiny little shopping cart or playing house with Kim in the summer times in Edmonds: nostalgic, happy and leaves me longing.



Several months ago I went salsa dancing with my best friend, Jerbarco, for an old friend's birthday. Another person from my past asked me if I still dance and when I told her no she asked "Is that hard for you?" I got kind of annoyed by the question and told her no. I have thought a lot about passions, dreams, and favorite pastimes since then.



I have spent the last 12 years of my life fighting for my dreams and I don't really have many regrets in that department. However, I have been thinking lately about how as we grow up we have to chose which dreams to chase (Except of course you little sister)in order to achieve success. My immediate reaction to that old acquaintance was that I am passionate about what I do, dancing was little girl's passion and I put all my energy into big girl dreams.



While I feel I was honest because it hasn’t really been hard for me to make a lot of sacrifices in my life, including dancing, the interaction sparked something in me. Perhaps it is because she is still chasing her artistic dreams of singing (and she is quite successful at it). But the truth is that now that I have taken the time to notice, I miss it. I really loved it.



I have been surrounded by remarkeably talented people throughout my life (including my beautiful and gifted sisters)and honeslty, I have few natural talents. Reading was hard for me, learning was hard for me, I was never good at any sports, I can’t sing like my sisters (I can’t sing at all), I am not much of an artist, and the list goes on. My talents are few: perseverance, quick wit and I used to have a natural ability to pick up any kind of dance. I could never afford lessons so I would learn it however I could. I did hip-hop, swing, ballet, rhythmic gymnastics, all styles of ballroom (Salsa, rumba and tango were my favorites), modern, lyrical and I even learned a little African from the bff.



I still don’t have time or money to change anything and now I am so old and out of shape that I am sure getting back into it would be depressing but I thought I would just give words to the realization of a lost passion I found still burns in my heart.