"Like"

So I have officially started dating again.  Let me just tell you, I don’t really like dating.  It is kind of exhausting.  But my friends think it is time and I need to do it so here I am.  Of course being the extreme over-thinker (and over-sharer) that I am, I have had a lot of thoughts pop into my mind.

Listening.

I went on a date the other day where someone remembered something I had said and it was a foreign feeling altogether.  I don’t know if people are just trying to pretend they listen at first but my ex-boyfriend never paid attention to a word I said.  It was a magical experience when he remembered something I had said and usually it wasn’t even really something I said but at least similar.  Truth be told, in four years he never once remembered my birthday.  I am not complaining, I am just noticing some qualities that I appreciate.  I don’t really talk a lot in a relationship, but I talk less when I don’t feel like I am being listened to. 

Respect.

I know this is broad, but everything it means, I want.  There is nothing that will make me angrier or leave quicker than feeling like I am not respected.  If you are going to make assumptions about me because of my size, face, body, skin color, age, or anything else, walk away.  I don’t want to spend my life trying to earn anyone’s respect.  I may be doing a poor job of explaining but if I have a different opinion, I want someone who respects me enough to know that my opinion matters, I probably developed that opinion for a reason and maybe even listen to why I have that opinion.

Humor.

I am not going to lie, someone that makes me laugh and we can keep the relationship light is one of the most important qualities.  I come from a family who survives because of laughter.  When I have a rough day at work, what I need is someone who I enjoy being with so much that I can let the day melt away.  This is something all my relationships have in common.  I want my partner to be my best friend.  This may be the most important quality for me.

Intelligence.

I don’t care if you went to college or finished high school or if you have a doctorate.  I absolutely look for a man that cares about intelligent issues and is not so lazy that they won’t do the research.  Ignorance is not cute to me and if you want to stay that way, neither are you. 

 Compassion.

My whole life is about caring for people.  My career goals, my reading list, and many activities I get involved in are all based on compassion and empathy.  If you don’t have those characteristics, if you don’t genuinely care about people, it just won’t work.

Humility.

There is just nothing sexier.  A man who could be proud but chooses to be humble is truly one of the most attractive character traits in the world.

Honesty.

I cannot stand being lied to.  It is my biggest pet peave. 

Smile

Can't help it.  I just really like nice teeth and full lips.  I know it's vain but it's my list.

So there you go dad, I guess you can consider this the beginning of that list you have been asking for the last 15 years.  lol.