Thursday, July 11, 2013

Energy and Fire


Most days I feel tired.  I feel empty.  I feel like I have nothing left to give and I don’t know how I will make it through the day or attempt tomorrow.  Most days I feel like a failure.  I feel old and tired and worn.  Most days, I think I have pushed myself too hard for too long and I just don’t have what it takes anymore, if I ever did. 
And then there are these brief moments when someone else' thought slips through my ever focused and ever tired mind.  I get a glimpse of a dream.  The dream of a little girl with all the energy of youth and all the fire of life who doesn’t understand resistance.  She just wants one day to change the world.  She wants beauty and justice and truth. She doesn’t know the world will fight her every step of the way.  She doesn’t know life will be hard on her.  And that little girl chases the exhaustion and bitterness and negativity in my mind.  For a brief second I am overwhelmed by an emotion I can’t explain.  I know I am living the realization of that little girl's dream as I writ this Writ of Habeas Corpus or study the Constitution.  She doesn’t know what it is but she wants this.  And I want to give it to her.

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