Closure

I realize that my blogs have become few and far between.  I am at one of those stages where I feel a little less humor and a little more stress and honestly, who wants to hear about my stress?  I don’t.  I would like to avoid it and I know you would too, so let’s avoid together shall we? 

I have a few issues to report bank to you on:

1) The epic mouse hunt has concluded.  The brave (and quite clever might I add) Ralph, my motorcycle mouse, breathed his last early Tuesday morning.  I believe he grew too confident with setting off those mouse traps for fun and eventually, he got caught (literally).  Bless his little heart. RIP Ralph.  You will be missed, your little poops will not.

2) I went to visit Gonzaga, had a major meltdown, and decided to return to repressing all feelings on the subject altogether.  My dad on the other hand really enjoyed it.  Apparently, in his eyes, every single man that has a Spokane address is better than anyone I have found thus far.  Fascinating really. 

3) I am still doing 2.5 jobs but as my dad always says, “I am one bad day away from retirement.”  I think about walking out the door and never coming back every single day. J 

4) I am going to Maui in 6 days and I think it is going to be amazing.  I think that it will be just what I need, seeing as at the moment I get raging pissed at a text message that I think is rude and then when I read it again I realize it wasn’t.  I think I need to breath for a few days.  J  Actually, I need therapy, but Maui will have to do for now.

5) I have done a pretty darn good job of saving my pennies (literally, you can ask my roommate).  I have saved about $5K and now I just need another $7K, in two months.   No big deal right?  Well this weekend I am selling almost everything I own so hopefully that helps.  Nobody can say I am not willing to give it all up for my dreams. 

Have I left you hangin’ on anything else?  These are all the things I can remember right now.  If there is further unfinished business that you need to cross over, just let me know. (Did you see what I did there, Little Sister?  FTW)

Good Morning

Every morning I go in to my boss’s office and we chat.  I never know what that conversation will hold.  Last week he told me that I look just like Kobe Bryant.  It was something about us having the same mouth.  Yesterday he said his life philosophy required him to never see me or speak to me again if I quit the firm.  Often he will give me his opinion on my outfit or what I chose to do with my evening.  It can be the highlight or the thorn of my day.

This morning, our conversation included some very nice comments.

He told me that I am honestly 1 in 6 billion and that I have a bigger picture (broader view) and better heart than any woman he has ever met.  He told me that because of those qualities mixed with my brightness, he believes I really can change the world with a J.D.  I never really know if he means anything he says to me but man that was what I needed to hear right now!

Then an hour later he walked behind me and yelled “Where’s Katrina!!”  That is my sister who quit 6 months ago and whose job I have been doing ever since.  I should be careful taking to heart the words of a crazy man.  J

Love Notes from Dad

I could analyze this picture and it's implications and the social effects and stereotypes to death.  However, I have a dad who loves me and knows my story and so I smile and post. :)  I love you dad.

I am looking forward to having my own space again.  I will enjoy being able to decorate it how I want it and make it my home.  These are some spaces I have fallen in love with for one reason or another.  I like clean simple space and I LOVE bookshelves.

 I just love this one.  I love the colors and the simplicity.  I would decorate the right wall that way but this is just so my style.

 I love these bookcases.  I also really like that chair.

 Oh I just love this room.  I hate the rug and I would put a different table in the window but I love it.  I could see my sisters and I spending a lot of time there.

More awesome bookcases.

This is just dreamy.  I don't think I will have the space to do this while in lawschool.  lol.

You May Say I'm a Dreamer

Do you ever feel like there is just not enough time or energy in this world to realize all your dreams?  Like you can only hold so many dreams before they all start to slip away from you and if you don’t accomplish the dreams you have, you will never know all the dreams inside you waiting to be realized.  I feel like my heart and my body are forever battling.  My heart wants to be free and live in a world of excitement and chance and forever dream catching.  My body belongs to a woman who has already lived out her dreams.  And my mind!  Oh my mind is like the evil stepmother in any fairy tale that wants to lock my heart away with all its dreams and hide the key, starving them both.  It is like deep inside I am an entirely different person that I want someone else to know but the truth is I barely know her myself. 

"Like"

So I have officially started dating again.  Let me just tell you, I don’t really like dating.  It is kind of exhausting.  But my friends think it is time and I need to do it so here I am.  Of course being the extreme over-thinker (and over-sharer) that I am, I have had a lot of thoughts pop into my mind.

Listening.

I went on a date the other day where someone remembered something I had said and it was a foreign feeling altogether.  I don’t know if people are just trying to pretend they listen at first but my ex-boyfriend never paid attention to a word I said.  It was a magical experience when he remembered something I had said and usually it wasn’t even really something I said but at least similar.  Truth be told, in four years he never once remembered my birthday.  I am not complaining, I am just noticing some qualities that I appreciate.  I don’t really talk a lot in a relationship, but I talk less when I don’t feel like I am being listened to. 

Respect.

I know this is broad, but everything it means, I want.  There is nothing that will make me angrier or leave quicker than feeling like I am not respected.  If you are going to make assumptions about me because of my size, face, body, skin color, age, or anything else, walk away.  I don’t want to spend my life trying to earn anyone’s respect.  I may be doing a poor job of explaining but if I have a different opinion, I want someone who respects me enough to know that my opinion matters, I probably developed that opinion for a reason and maybe even listen to why I have that opinion.

Humor.

I am not going to lie, someone that makes me laugh and we can keep the relationship light is one of the most important qualities.  I come from a family who survives because of laughter.  When I have a rough day at work, what I need is someone who I enjoy being with so much that I can let the day melt away.  This is something all my relationships have in common.  I want my partner to be my best friend.  This may be the most important quality for me.

Intelligence.

I don’t care if you went to college or finished high school or if you have a doctorate.  I absolutely look for a man that cares about intelligent issues and is not so lazy that they won’t do the research.  Ignorance is not cute to me and if you want to stay that way, neither are you. 

 Compassion.

My whole life is about caring for people.  My career goals, my reading list, and many activities I get involved in are all based on compassion and empathy.  If you don’t have those characteristics, if you don’t genuinely care about people, it just won’t work.

Humility.

There is just nothing sexier.  A man who could be proud but chooses to be humble is truly one of the most attractive character traits in the world.

Honesty.

I cannot stand being lied to.  It is my biggest pet peave. 

Smile

Can't help it.  I just really like nice teeth and full lips.  I know it's vain but it's my list.

So there you go dad, I guess you can consider this the beginning of that list you have been asking for the last 15 years.  lol.